Strawberry Mountain

Randy Pausch

I'm so sad.  I have been keeping up with Randy's valiant struggle with pancreatic cancer for a long time now.  I usually check his website daily for news from him.  Yesterday, my friend "M" and I were even talking about how he hadn't updated it for almost a month, and we were both hoping that wasn't a sign that he was becoming sicker. 

Sadly, he was.  She emailed me this morning saying that she heard on the radio that he had passed away this morning.  I found this article on CNN about him.

Although, it was expected, I've been hoping against hope he would make it much longer.  I saw him first on Oprah.  Then I watched his last lecture video on You Tube.  He is such an inspiration to me.  He has the kind of attitude about life that I can only hope I can attain.

I've thought about him so much over the time I've known about him.  I'd come across a difficult situation, and think to myself, "What would Randy do?".  So, though this is a sad day, I can say that the world is a much better place because he was here.  He has left us an eternal message of hope, perseverance and a way to live your life with integrity.

If you haven't watched this, I encourage you to do so.

Godspeed Randy..

On Helping

I'm excited.

I have a very large King Sized Lodgepole bed.  It's really big.

Tonight, Brian was able to help me pull the sheets over it when I was changing the sheets.  This may not seem like a lot, but for me it was huge.  I had help making my bed...then Leslie, she helped me pull the down comforter up.  I was amazed. 

I HATE making the bed, HATE HATE HATE it.  I've always wanted to be one of those people who hop out of bed, and make the bed.  I can do that, two...maybe three days in a row, then it's over, I'm making it before I go to bed...I'm sadly digressing here. 

But the gist of it, is that my kids are starting to get old enough to help me.  Last night, they cleaned the living room.  When I went to bed, it was picked up, and I hadn't picked it up...freaking amazing!

Cuteness

Today Brian said to me:

"Mommy, can you please tickle me?"

I said, "Brian, you just told me not to tickle you."

Brian said, "I know Mommy, but my fingers are too tired to tickle myself."

I about rolled off the couch, and had to share.

Chicago

Yesterday, we went into Chicago.  It was pretty amazing, even though we didn't have time to do much.

We took the Metra Train into Chicago.  That in itself was so surreal for me.  When we approached the train platform, it struck me just how similar to Cal-Train this was.  When the train pulled up, it was the same train.  Different place, same train.  I spent so many years in my 30's commuting to and from work, and from San Francisco to Santa Clara.  It was a like a trip back into my life.  Except this time, I was one of the tourists, with the small children I used to look at like..."ha...please don't ask me to sit next to me."

Even the yellow bumpy tile next  the train platform looked just like Cal-Train, it was just weird to me how familiar it all was and I had never been there before.

On the actual train ride, the kids were so excited that they both ate their way through their snackpack back packs that I had fixed for them.  Luckily for us, both food and drinks were allowed on the train.  The ride into town took about 90 minutes and we picked up  a friend along the way.

Once we got into Chicago at "Olgilvie" Station.  I'm not sure I spelled that right, but oh well.  Right off the bat, I saw several places I would have liked to have lunch at.  Places I haven't seen since I left CA.

Because we had already decided to have lunch on Navy Pier, we walked past all of these places and headed to Sears Tower.  It was really fun.  The kids got an absolute kick out of being up so high, but I'm not sure they got as big of a kick out of it as Rick did.  Here are some pictures that we took up at the observation deck.

After the Sears Tower, we took a taxi over to Navy Pier.  First stop on our list, Bubba Gump's Chicago!  This was one of our favorite places to eat in San Francisco, and it didn't let us down here either, except they didn't have the "Shrimpin Dipin Pot" on the menu.  That is the dish Rick and I both like best, but they said it was seasonal.  Maybe because San Francisco has such cold summers, a pot of hot shrimp is more appetizing in the summer time there.  It was so hot here, it is understandable why we were not able to partake of this, but at the same time, we had a great time.  I had my 2nd favorite dish, the coconut shrimp.  It is so good.  I could have eaten an entire 2nd course of them.  I didn't.  Rick had the stuffed shrimp and the kids had typical kids fare consisting of Mac and cheese and Cheese Pizza.

After lunch, we just wandered around for awhile.  I took Brian up on the Ferris wheel.  I got some great pictures, but would have liked to go around a few more times than we did.  You only get to go around once.

So this was our trip into Chicago.  We had planned to meet my friend Bernie for dinner when we returned to Crystal Lake, but we were still too full from lunch, and too tired from our day.  We took the train home, and both kids were asleep as soon as it started moving.  All in all it was a super nice day.

I really enjoyed walking over the bridges, think Julia Roberts in "My Best Friends Wedding", hearing the street musicians, seeing all the people and especially spending the day with a very dear friend.

Today, we had planned to hit the beach in Crystal Lake, but for the first time in 30 odd years, it was closed because of bacteria.  So we ended up hanging out at Bernie's, going to Sushi, and then coming back and taking a long nap.  As I sit here, watching the fire flies and waiting for my last load of laundry to get done, I really think I'm ready to head home.

Tomorrow we will head through Wisconsin to Minnesota to camp in Minneapolis.  Saturday, we will hit Bismark ND...Sunday night will be in Billings MT and then home finally sometime very early afternoon on Monday.  Yeah!  It's always nice to vacation, but I really think the best part is actually getting back home again.

You Are a Red Crayon

Your world is colored with bright, vivid, wild colors. You have a deep, complex personality - and you are always expressing something about yourself. Bold and dominant, you are a natural leader. You have an energy that is intense... and sometimes overwhelming. Your reaction to everything tends to be strong. You are the master of love-hate relationships. Your color wheel opposite is green. Green people are way too mellow to understand what drives your energy.

What Color Crayon Are You?

You Are a Little Messy

You aren't the cleanest person in the world, but you're definitely not a slob. You clean up when you have the time, but you're realistic about what you can get done. Generally, you're pretty organized and tidy - though you may have a few hidden messes. You eventually get around to making things spotless, but you do it on your own schedule!

Are You Messy?

Toot Toot Tuesday

I've never done this before, but here goes.  I think the thing I have done best this week is make this vacation all about the kids.  I have gotten my 44 year old behind in pools from MT to IL, taken my kids to do things that were totally fun, documented it all for prosperity, and wonder of wonders, I took them to Chuck E. Cheeses.  I think this is the first vacation they will actually remember, and they are having the time of their lives...and that makes me so inexplicably happy.

Fire Flies in Flight

I've seen them, finally!

Fireflies.  I've never seen even one during my entire life, I was very close to considering them an old wives tale, but now I can guarantee you that they do indeed exist!  Who knew?  The light up for the briefest of moments, like a small comet falling through the night sky.  I had one land on my truck last night and watched it light up and go off about 4 different times before it flew away.

We have landed in the Nazi KOA camp.  This place is money hungry and greedy.  They have these stupid rules, that put me in "I want to break all of them mode." You can't bring in your own firewood, you have to use their $6.00 a bundle wood.  You can't wear sandals or water shoes into the pool area.  The KOA workers make patrols around in their little golf carts.  I've never seen a KOA like this one, and can pretty much guarantee that we won't ever stay in this one again when we come back.

That aside, today was a really nice day. 

My good friend Bernie, came up to this KOA camp to visit.  We took the kids and spent the morning hanging out at the pool, then wandering to the playground, and back to the pool again.  The kids relaxed, I relaxed, and Rick got some much needed time off.  I decided today that I would let the kids run the show.  I took snacks, drinks, sunscreen, etc, and let them call the shots.  We stayed in the pool until they themselves were ready to get out.

Bernie and I brought them back to the camper and fixed a lunch of sandwiches, chips, potato salad and iced teal.  Brian and Leslie barely ate, and were lying down in the chairs falling asleep.  Finally Rick took them in the trailer and all three of them went down for a nap.  Bernie and I sat around talking for the majority of the afternoon.  It was so good to see her.

Tonight we met her boyfriend Andy. 

We wanted to go someplace kid friendly, and he actually suggested "Chuck E. Cheeses".  (is this guy a saint or what?)  Anyway, we took him up on it, and met Bernie, Andy and his son there tonight.  All I can say is what an awesome time the kids had.  We must have hit a great night because there was hardly anyone there, we were able to let the kids run around pretty much unattended.  For those of you who are not familiar with C.E.C's, they hand stamp the kids and grown ups when you enter, and will not let you leave with kids that are not stamped the same as you.  They have a worker by the door who checks all hands as you leave.  

Now, I know this could still mean problems, but between that, the place being fairly empty, and Andy's son Alex keeping an eye on the kids for part of the night, we were able to have a very enjoyable time there, much to my utter amazement.

Tomorrow we are heading into the city on the train.  I'm pretty excited about this. I never thought I'd actually make it to Chicago.  First on our list is Sears Tower, then Navy Pier.

I really want to have a piece of "Chicago style pizza" or a hot dog.

May Mommies do KC 2008!

Our weekend is over.  It was amazing.

11 May Mommy’s and families met up in KC for a weekend of fun.

 

We started off on Friday night by the pool.  The kids, all for the most part who had been trapped in car seats for the majority of the day were especially grateful to be out and able to run around with other kids.  They were jumping in and out of the pool, for so long, and their energy never came to an end.

 

 

It was like a family reunion.  Everyone was completely happy to be there, and it was strange how comfortable we all felt with each other.  I know a few times, I had to take Leslie or Brian to the bathroom, and I asked someone to watch the other kid, without even thinking.  Trust was that high.

Saturday, we did May Kids T-shirts after breakfast.  This entailed a t-shirt for each kid, with each of the May Kids hand print on it.  We also did a May Kids Sibling shirt for the siblings.  I didn’t have anything to do with this craft, it was Joelle who organized it, but it was a smashing success. 

We were originally supposed to go to a water park on Saturday afternoon.  But as the day turned cold and rainy, we went to plan “B” which was a trip to “Build a Bear”.  I’ve never been there, and neither have the kids, so I just closed my eyes and let them get what they wanted.  They had fun, although Leslie, she had originally wanted a “pink” bear.  Then she wanted a turtle, then the leopard, she couldn’t make up her mind.  So I made the executive Mommy decision to go with the pink bear.  She didn’t care anything about making it, so we had Brian stuff it for her, and kiss it’s heart, and we talked Leslie into putting the heart in the bear.

 

Finally when the bear was complete, she was interested in dressing it.  We ended up with a sparkly white t-shirt for it that said “CUTIE” in sequins.  Brian chose the panda bear, and then chose a “Spiderman” costume for his bear.  He named it “Peter Parker”, and we named Leslie’s “Cutie”.  Both bears came with their own condo and birth certificate.

 

When we returned to the hotel from B.A.B.W., we crashed out for awhile then woke the kids up and took them swimming in the hotel pool. 

The highlight of the weekend for me was Saturday night.  All the mommy’s got to go out to dinner, and all the daddies stayed at the hotel in the room we rented out for the night and took care of the kids for us.  They did really well, I think we were all a bit nervous, but they really stepped up and let us have a night out, which was a major blast.  I had fried dill pickles for the first time in my life, and they were actually really yummy.  We also got a “dirty dump truck”, which was a huge huge ice cream brownie sundae served in a plastic dump truck that we all split.  It was too much fun.

Last night, we all sat out in the hall by our rooms and talked late into the night, and this morning was full of tear-filled good byes.

This is our "goodbye picture"

Now we are driving on Hwy 70, through the Missouri country side on our way to Saint Louis to see Rick’s old friend for one night.  After that, we are making our way up to Chicago for a few days to visit my friend Bernie.

I’m amazed at this countryside as it passes by us.  It is so different than either Montana or California.  It is lush, green and overgrown.   Vegetation covers every square inch.  I keep thinking we are coming up on the coast, but we are not.  I’m not sure if this is actually “the delta”, but it sure looks like I’ve always imagined it would.

In the last 40 miles, we’ve passed two “adult sex stores” and about 100 fireworks superstores.  I guess Missouri must be the “fireworks capitol of the US."

More later from Saint Louis.

Finally, the Midwest

Well, we are deep into Iowa.  I’m sure we had the air conditioner running, as we only got a little over 100 miles on a tank of gas.  We stopped in this little town called “Little Sioux”, seriously on empty, and it looked like there was no gas station.  The first one we came upon was a Cenex, which was closed down tight, out of business, and had weeds growing all over the parking lot.

We kept going further, and came up on this building, one pump, that had regular gas...Thank goodness.  We filled up, and it came to $91.00.  So we paid basically $100.00 dollars for 100 miles.  We were just grateful they even had gas.

We spent the night at the KOA in Sioux Falls with my friend Joelle, her husband Kent and their two boys Carter and Grayson, who are from Winnipeg Canada.  It was so fun.  Although Joelle and I have never met before in person, we have been Internet friends for 6 years.  We’ve also talked on the phone several times over the years.

It was like talking to someone I had been friends with for years, it was amazing.  I had such a good time.  We were even too busy talking to realize we forgot part of dinner last night.  Our husbands were talking just as much, and the kids got along great and were fast friends from the get go.

So we took them swimming in the pool, and both of my kids turned into fishes yesterday.  Brian was still really scared and clinging on to me, but was getting a little easier about it.  Leslie, she was already doing fine, but became even braver.

I tried to coax Brian into jumping off the side of the pool to me, and he was very scared and wouldn’t do it, until he saw Carter do it.  That was all it took.  He started jumping off the side to me, and began to trust his life jacket.  He began dog-paddling to the edge, holding onto the edge to work his way to the ladder and then jumped again.  When Leslie saw Brian doing it, of course she had to get into the act and started jumping to Rick.  To say the kids had a good time is an understatement.  To say the grownups had a good time was an even bigger understatement.

As we are driving through Iowa, I’m struck by the sameness of it.  I guess I expected it to look so different than what I am used to, and though it does, not so much that it looks foreign either.  Just normal, green country side with a lot of corn farms.  The corn looks like it is doing well, and hopefully this is representative of the corn crop as a whole, and not just the area we are in due to the floods that happened in the previous months.

We are currently driving through “Council Bluffs Iowa” and can see city center of Omaha off in the distance.  We are now at the halfway point between Sioux Falls and Kansas City.

Last Night in Mount Rushmore KOA

It's our last night here, and I have to say, by far has this been the best day weather wise.  I spent the morning doing laundry, which was a welcome break away from the kids.  Managed to get 4 loads of laundry dirty since Saturday morning when we left, which is sort of amazing considering I was really trying to conserve clothes, but oh well.

I'm really excited about tomorrow night.  We are meeting my friends from Winnipeg CA, Joelle, Kent, Carter and Grayson in Sioux Falls KOA.  We also possibly might meet up with my friend Aimee and crew there as well.  This trip is getting more exciting by the minute.  It's hard to believe that tomorrow night, I will be camping with some very dear friends.

Rick just called me a wuss because I'm not writing what he wants me to write at this very moment, but I'm digressing.

This weekend is going to be amazing.  Maybe you won't get it.  I'm not sure anyone but the "May Mommy's" will get this weekend.

We met, almost 6 years ago on an Internet due date forum on www.about.com.  As our babies were born, one by one, beginning with Brian, we became a close knit group of people.  After all the babies were born, sometime in August of 03, we closed the group down, went private and elected not to let anyone that was not already in the group in.  We have lost a few members over the years, but for the most part, we have the same people we started with.  To say we are close, that is an understatement.  This group of people, of whom I've only met 3 in person, has been the biggest support system I've had, hands down.  They were the people I called first when Leslie was in the NICU, when I was life flighted out of Helena to Great Falls.  They are the ones I go to first, for every thing I am unsure of.  There is not much this group of women do not know about me, or I know about them.

We know each others husbands, who they are, what they do.  We know all the kids, and pretty much every thing about those kids.  There is unfailing support for me, and for them in this group.  We know we are special.  We've been through the very happiest of times together, as well as the darkest of times.  Our husbands have quit questioning the "May Mommies", and what they mean.  They get it.  It has felt funny, to say to people, I'm going to meet a group of women I know from the Internet to people in my "real life".  Then I think, these women are my real life.  They are my best friends.  How lucky am I?

So, when we decided to plan a trip to meet, finally in "real life", for the kids 5th birthday celebration, various husbands were pretty much on board.  We've been planning this upcoming weekend for about 6 months, or about 6 years, depending on how you look at it, and who you ask.

I can't wait, I have hope in my heart and babies I need to "smash".

Over and out from South Dakota!

Sweet Nacho's!

It's so beautiful here.  We arrived here on Sunday, and got checked into the KOA.  This place is really nice.  We promptly went to Mount Rushmore and saw it for the first time, it was nothing less than spectacular. 

We have been back up there twice so far, and will probably go again tomorrow because I want/need to peruse the gift shop and take some more pictures. I still haven't gotten one of the kids and I with Mt Rushmore as a back drop. We met our friends Aimee and Jeff, who live in VA but grew up in SD here today for a ride on the 1880 train. I have already done a post about that so I won't go into great detail about it here. When we got home, we had grand plans to BBQ ribeye's for dinner, but had such a huge lunch at the "Alpine Inn", we elected to have sandwiches tonight and save the steaks for tomorrow. I had a nice long nap this afternoon which was killer, love love loved it. Brian found himself a new little friend to play with outside. Her name is "Cindy". I wasn't outside when it happened, but Rick said that she rode by on her bike a few times, and Brian looked at him and said, "that girl likes me" and then he went and played with her for the rest of the night. They rode bikes, kicked the ball around and had a great time for a few hours. When she went in, I sat with Brian and Rick for quite awhile outside, and Brian told us all about the mean killer snakes his "friend Ise" has killed...then he told us about "Ise's cousin's "Sara and Alice" who are expert snake hunters. It was so wonderful sitting out in front of the fire with my boy listening to his stories. Leslie was happy and content in the camper watching "Dora" over and over, and I was happy and content she was doing that because I wasn't having to run after her. Tomorrow will be laundry, swimming (hopefully if the weather cooperates) and a wonderful trip to the gift shop at MT Rushmore, along with a killer BBQ for dinner...life is good. Brian standing in front of a TeePee on the Mount Rushmore path. Brian rock climbing.

1880 Train, Hill City South Dakota

Rick had the camera for the most part, so we didn't get as many pictures as I would have liked, and we totally forgot to get a group photo.

We met Aimee, Jeff and crew at the train station, and I recognized her right away.   All was well and we had a great time riding the train, the kids behaved pretty well considering except Leslie fell asleep on me, she wasn't living up to her wild woman reputation!  When we got back we went to lunch at this place in Hill City that Aimee and Jeff liked called the "Alpine Inn"...OMG...great food, but the desert, I think it was hands down the best desert I've ever had.  "It was called a "napoleon" and it was pastry filled with bavarian cream and drizzled with chocolate....too good for words. I'd also love to pick up a gallon or so of their potato salad....I could have made meal on that potato salad.

Brian was so excited when we got home, he is now calling Ryan "his new best friend".  It was great to meet Aimee finally, exactly like I thought, the first of many great meetings to come this week, like I had known her all along.  Her kids are absolutely beautiful, and Ryan hopped right on my lap so I got some Ryan cuddles!!!!

Here is the link to the pictures we did get.

All in all it was a great time and I'm so glad we got to meet them. 

Vacation 2008

Here we go folks.

We are pulling out tomorrow, we are almost completely packed right now, with just a bit to do in the morning.  My neighbors were great today, Brian was at their house playing all day, and it gave me the time I needed to get everything ready to go. 

This was not as easy as it should have been, my knees were screeching pain today.  I don't know if it' is because of Oscar, or because I spent the entire day Wednesday after I put him to sleep in the garden, but they haven't hurt this much for awhile. 

Oscar left gently, and I'm grateful for that.  I am doing OK, I really am.  I feel peaceful because I'm certain that was the correct decision for him.  He all but told me so.  I still miss him, but I'm grateful we had him for as long as we did.

So stay tuned.  I'm planning on updating with pictures as often as I can while we are gone.

We will be staying in Sheridan WY tomorrow night, then on to Mount Rushmore for a few days.  After that, it's Sioux Falls and then Kansas City, St. Louis and Chicago.  I'm beyond excited because after we leave Wyoming, I'll be in completely new territory.  My life as "never been east of Colorado" is just about over.

I'll catch you on the flip side!

On Missing Oscar

I'm sitting here at midnight, unable to sleep.

This day, has been long and hot.  Stifling hot.  I knew back when I was complaining about it being so cold for so long, that this day would come and I wouldn't like it.  I'm going to say it for the thousandth time, I hate hate hate the heat.  I must purchase an air-conditioner for this house. 

So here I sit, in my house on the hill, comfortable for the first time today.  There is a breeze blowing in through every open window in this house.  I have every fan going.  It smells of rain outside.  The wind has been blowing enough to blow one of my hanging pots off the hook tonight.  People are shooting off fireworks, early and loud.

This is why I cannot sleep.  This is the bane of my life, I can never sleep.  I'm a night owl.  I love the nights, especially when it is hot all day.  It's the most peaceful time, the quiet time.

I'm trying to get my head around Oscar.  I've made an appointment for Wednesday morning to have him put to sleep.  I know in both my head and my heart that this is the right thing to do.  I know it.  Still,  the thought of not having him in my life anymore, is almost intolerable.  He's been there through every major up and down for nearly the last 20 years of my life. 

This is the cat, that people that do not like cats love.  This is my old guy.  My loving kitty.  I want to turn back the clock for a bit, he's been such a faithful cat. I haven't been as good of a cat mom as I was before I had the kids, but luckily he loves my kids as I do.

I'm sure, deep down, this is why I cannot sleep tonight.  I know tomorrow will be worse.  How do you prepare for this?  I've done it before.  Maybe there is just no way to prepare for it.  Maybe I just have to feel it, and help my kids through it, because when you love a pet the way I love Oscar, there is going to be a huge hole left.  A void that no animal will be able to fill.  I remember my pets that have gone, and though I loved them, this one cat, has meant the world to me, and he's going to be missed by everyone.