A little snippet from my email.

Someone sent this to me in an email, and I have no idea who wrote it, it must one of those things running around the internet:

From the Manitoba Herald

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada hasintensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stopthe illegal immigration.

The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left- leaningcitizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree withBill O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociologyprofessors, animal- rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields atnight. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywoodproducer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whoseacreage borders North Dakota.

The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry."He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When Isaid I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him myscreenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences,but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blareRush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "Theliberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn'tgive milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals nearthe Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them acrossthe border and leave them to fend for themselves. "

A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though.

"When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailingloudly that they fear retribution from conservatives.

Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishingre-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beerand watch NASCAR races.

In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossingthe border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buycheap Canadian prescription drugs.

After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como andRosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the 50's. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show , we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said.

"How many art-history majors does one country need?

Comments

[Solo]

Kind of off topic, but this post made me think... if you ever want to make loads of money you can always take those kids of yours to Japan. They'd be a huge hit. Cute little faces, yellow hair. They're GOOD LUCK!

[The Lizard]

Can you please keep them? :)